Here is an attempt to capture moments of my reality... A diary of the very things I never pay attention to - uncensored and rough. Thoughts and details I would never think of adding or dwell on... It's probably the most boring thing to do, but I'm still trying to figure out the meaning of absolutely everything in the world and so it is I have to start somewhere (which would be me)... It's a little experiment, really. I am, after all, always ready to become my own guinea pig to push the boundless limits of my mind.

Friday 26 November 2010


So today was graduation day… I went there with the little family. I’m actually glad I went… But I feel exausted from all that social effort. I don't know about you, but being social drains me. I can feel the energy being sucked out of my body and brain every time I have to spend too long in the company of people, especially crowds of them.

The place in which they held the ceremony was sumptuous, mind you. And it also felt like the end of an era, I suppose. Oh, and walking up and down those ancient corridors from bygone times wearing these gowns and that black cap kind of felt like we were wandering around Hogwards.

I had to get there early as I forgot to book a gown - again. I forgot the first time around, too… I bumped into T in front of the building and she gave me a lovely contrived smile, eyeing me up and down swiftly first. That girl was part of a group of people who I guess used to be my friends back in second year.

After that, I waved at a few people, but no one really came to me and I wasn’t able to find S, which is a shame. S was one of very few people I could actually stand in my year mainly because, just like me, she was quiet and liked to keep to herself.

Then I bumped into L, and she seemed genuinely happy to see me. She’d been so scared to end up all on her own with no one to talk to that she called me last night to make sure we'd meet in front of the building. I said 'yeah, sure. Please stop stressing.' She giggled and asked me if I was nervous. I said 'No. It's just a ceremony where we'll be wearing weird clothes while our parents take way too many pictures.' Then I added: 'I hope it snows tomorrow, that would actually make it interesting.' She said she hoped it wouldn't snow and that got her worrying about what would happen if it did snow and her train was delayed.

We met several times as we all wandered about in our Harry Potter gowns in the ancient parts of that building… I have to say this graduation was way better than the law one, and I think I’ll remember far more of it. Though it was pompous and full of cheesy speeches from the dean and other bizzarly dressed professors, I could just gaze around me at the ancient statues and chandeliers hanging down from the high domed ceiling. It was good that the speeches happen to be so long and boring, too, for it gave me time to try and decypher the latin inscriptions carved on the old stones.

I also got to see a good tutor of mine. She told me that the student magazine on which I worked last year is no more… apparently the new Vice Chancellor doesn’t like the idea of students interviewing staff…and they didn't like it when people such as myself went out of their ways to ditch the dirt on that university.... talk about control and always more control. She told me she wasn’t going to fight it… what’s the point, she sighed. I guess our lot was lucky enough to escape right before the net of complete control finally closed in on that university. We got away with ditching quite a lot of dirt going on inside that place.... but that was only because the previous Vice Chancellor didn't mind it. Interestingly, he was sacked pretty quickly. Well, officially he wasn't 'sacked' - they offered him half a million to go quietly.

And now... unless you're going to write about how wonderful the system is, you'll have no chance in the world to see your work published through that university. Would I really be going too far by assuming that the same thing applies as far as all the mainstream media is concerned?...

Having said that, I'll be keeping an eye out on Wikileaks set to release highly confidential government data. I just hope it's more than petty name-calling between chiefs of states.

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