It's 01.28am and I can't sleep. I tossed and turned for ages, forced my eyes shut, squeezed them shut, even pressed my forearm against them, even buried my face in my pillow. To no avail.
So I opened my eyes again and stared at the darkness around me for a while... Is it possible to listen to silence? I think I was. I let my thoughts wander about for a moment, but then I realised that even in my head all was quiet. I conjured up an old fantasy of mine and watched it like a movie in my mind's eye... I made it action-packed and I even let the heros win in the end.
Well, I'm still wide awake, so it didn't work. I didn't get to drift to sleep this time, and maybe it just means that I'm not tired. So now I'm sitting at my desk, immersed in darkness, staring out the window at a sky black as ink... a black veil with not even one star in sight. From time to time a distant plane's lights will flicker, I guess that'll have to do.
Even the trees are black in the night, but they'll only look scary in winter, when all that can be seen are their naked, distorted limbs that look just like the bony fingers of ghosts reaching out for the sky.
I never really listened to that song until today, but then it came on and it just happened to suit my mood perfectly, at least for the day. I'm not even sure I actually like that song... Sometimes I'll listen to something over and over again, and before I know it, I'll never listen to it again.
There I was planning to wake up at dawn tomorrow - or should I say today? Well, I'd say the chances for that are under 10% right now. But hey, who cares? It doesn't matter.
I wish I could take a walk outside right this minute. Every time I happen to venture outside in the heart of night, or right before dawn, it feels as though I'm walking on an empty stage - nothing feels real. It is truly as though the whole world is but a theater stage whose actors are absent. And I'm the only one allowed to wander around... Even the air smells different... Eery and mysterious. And even your footsteps will echo in your wake.
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