I don't know why I freaked out last night... Maybe it was the lack of sleep. I went to bed past 3am and still managed to wake up before 10am. Isn't that amazing? (not really)
The sun is out today, or at least it is for now.
I went out for a short stroll earlier and was again taken off-guard by the chilling wind. Winter's at the door... I wonder if it will be snowing again this year. On the way back home I thought about an old friend of mine and decided to send her a quick message aknowledging the fact that we had drifted away over time, but maybe there was still a chance to reconnect?
She was a good friend to me but I pushed her away when some bad things happened and she was involved in them. I tend to be the unforgiving type and when someone hurts me, I hurt them even more. I know that about me now, and I try to keep it under control but it's hard. A lifetime of struggles (inner and out) can do that to you.
I often wonder how people manage to get such regular lives. They go to school, get a job, get married, have kids, etc... It's like their path was all traced for them (but of course I am aware that everyone has their own problems and struggles)... I mean, if you look at the bigger picture for most people, you see the same kind of path for them all.
So where is mine? Why is it I don't have a clear-cut one like everyone else?
I guess I'm just missing something, and until I find out what it is I'll remain stuck in that vicious circle. I need perhaps something that will shock me out of my comfort zone.
Also, as much as I hate to admit it, I have been listening to this and I'm not sure why, but I guess it puts me in the kind of mood I like.
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